At that bastion of Pro-Americanism (kidding), NewsWeek’s gives down arrows to President Bush, Vice President Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld in a special edition of New’s Week’s Convention Wisdom, gleefully introduced with the following obnoxious “Gee, that little war was easy, just like we told everybody. Now it’s on to Iran, North Korea and… Wha!! They’re fighting back? No fair!”

  • On President Bush: “Steadfast, but his war cluelessly flings open the gates of hell, making any sort of victory Pyrrhic.”

  • On Vice President Cheney: “Tells Meet the Press just before war, ‘We will be greeted as liberators.’ An arrogant blunder for the ages.”

  • Rumsfeld, down arrow: “Taking fire from TV retired generals for flawed war plan. And how did you miss the fedayeen?”

Meanwhile in reality…

[W]aving Iraqis lined the streets when the advance northwards to Baghdad was resumed….”Maybe this is the parade they had promised us,” said Sgt Gary Harrison, as he returned a greeting with a wave. “They sure seem happy to see us. Let’s hope they aren’t the only ones.” As they passed, hundreds, possibly thousands, of people emerged from their houses to signal their welcome.Whole families stood together outside their homes, the children smiling and their parents urging the Americans forward….Capt David Waldron, 31, commander of the Black Knights tank company, said: “When we drove into this town and I saw the crowds I told everyone to keep their head down. But they were so obviously friendly that I ended up waving back, too. “I even tied a Stars and Stripes to the end of my machinegun as they need to know who it is who is liberating them. “We’ve been hearing this from a number of areas now. It seems the message is getting through what we are doing here.” …Yesterday’s demonstration was the first large-scale welcome the Americans had received. [Daily Telegraph, 4/1/03]

Hundreds of Iraqis shouting “Welcome to Iraq” greeted Marines who entered the town of Shatra Monday after storming it with planes, tanks and helicopter gunships. A foot patrol picked its way through the small southern town, 20 miles north of the city of Nassiriya, after being beckoned in by a crowd of people. “There’s no problem here. We are happy to see Americans,” one young man shouted. [Reuters, 3/31/03]

Triumphant Royal Marine commandos yesterday mopped up the final traces of resistance in the south of Basra…They received a warm welcome from the members of the 30,000-strong population, with children and adults giving the thumbs-up, smiling and shouting “Mister, mister, England good”. One surprised Royal Marine said: “We were meant to be giving them food but they keep coming up to us and giving us stuff.” [Daily Telegraph, 4/1/03]

Brig. Gen. Vincent Brooks described several instances in which local residents had helped U.S. forces throughout the country, paving the way for successful attacks against “death squads” loyal to Saddam. In one case north of the south-central Iraqi town of Nasiriyah, 100 local tribesmen joined U.S. soldiers in capturing Iraqi military prisoners and removing explosives from a bridge, he said. In the western desert, Brooks said residents of a town led U.S. troops to a hospital where weapons, munitions and gas masks were found. He said the residents carried the cache into the desert where it was blown up. [Associated Press, 4/1/03]

Alter and his Newsweek clan must be pissed. [Thanks to Paul Blair for the heads up!]

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